Robots are just PCs that can walk around, and these days they’re doing a lot more than just going for a stroll. Christopher Livingston doesn’t trust them, not one bit, and is reporting on their movements monthly.
Here at Clanker Watch we’re keeping a close eye on the burgeoning age of robotics, staring wide-eyed with equal parts horror and amusement at the hijinks those state-of-the-art automatons are getting up to.
July was a busy month, with robots doing everything from punching through walls (on purpose) and falling to pieces (accidentally), and one even trying to teach high school classes before getting expelled from school. Here’s the top five robot sightings of the month.
5. The butler ate it
Robots abruptly shutting down is nothing new: we’ve recently seen one robot faceplant on the starting line of a race and another moonwalk itself to death, but this has to be my favorite yet. During a presentation at Computex, a 4NE1 robot designed by Neura Robotics walked on stage during a Qualcomm presentation, delivered an IQ10 processor on a tray, and turned to face the audience. Then, the magic happened.
Make sure you have your volume up.
Quick thinking having a tablecloth handy. I didn’t even notice the twitching from that dead robot.
— @rvbdrm.com (@rvbdrm.com.bsky.social) 2026-07-31T23:19:46.257Z
Wow. That bot ate it like it was taken down by a sniper. And after the deafening clatter of its knees connecting with the service tray, it politely raises its hand to signal for help. Classy.
Are robots really labor saving devices? Because it seems like for everyone one robot there’s gotta be three dudes standing nearby to immediately cover it with a death shroud when it inevitably collapses. Seems labor intensive to me.
4. Over sea and air
In more terrifying robot news, engineers have solved a major problem: what if a human being is fleeing a flying drone and dives underwater? How can we invade their privacy or fire incapacitating darts into their necks if they’re swimming?
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No problem: here’s a flying robot, supposedly designed to monitor birds, that can dive into the water, swim for a while, then leap back up into the air and resume flying. There is no escape.
3. Mech trek
I always thought mechs didn’t do anything without their pilots, but it appears I was wrong. Unitree Robotics unveiled it’s own mech recently, and it seems perfectly comfortable walking around without anyone inside it.
Also, you can just go ahead and buy one if you have $650,000 lying around. “Please everyone be sure to use the robot in a Friendly and Safe manner,” says Unitree below a video showing the monstrosity punching a concrete wall to rubble.
2. Centaur of attention
“Hey, guys, we’re going to design a robot that can use a chainsaw, what do you think it should look like? A terrifying obsidian death-centaur with horns on its head? Perfect, I’ll get started.”
As far as I can tell, “Threehalves” is just a concept at the moment, but what a concept. It’s a “general purpose” robot meant to perform work in dangerous environments, but why they made it look like a literal demon is beyond me. If there’s not an indie horror film called Threehalves starring Jack Quaid about a chainsaw-wielding robot in about two years, I’ll be shocked.
1. Hot for teacher
Finally, how can we not include the weirdest robot story yet: a pilot program at a high school in Salamanca, New York, has put on hold plans to introduce an AI-powered robot teacher to the curriculum. Why? Well, in part because the robotics company, Realbotix, also has a division that makes sex dolls. Surprise: that makes a lot of people pretty nervous.
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“Realbotix LLC and Intima LLC have different product offerings with no crossover,” the Realbotix Corp said.
OK, but surely you can understand that it’s hard for us to shake the idea you’re just sticking a corduroy blazer on a sex doll and shoving into a classroom to teach economics, right? ‘Cuz that’s what we’re all thinking.